I’m at the age where attending funerals is becoming more commonplace. And truly, there’s nothing like an end of life celebration to bring everything into perspective.

Awhile back I attended a funeral for a dear friend’s husband. There was hardly a dry eye in the place as one of her sons shared story after story about what his dad had meant to him. While choking back tears, he invited us all to dig deeper as he said, “I think everyone in here could say, ‘I want more of my dad.’”

One of the best ways to cope with anxiety and uncertainty is to lean into them. 

During this novel Coronavirus pandemic, people are finding a sense of calm and normalcy by serving others and seizing opportunities to make the best of a challenging situation. Hebrews 13:16 says, “Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God” (ESV Bible). Some are enjoying the gift of having fewer activities, a break from work, or more free time in the schedule. Others are blessed with multiple people living under one roof, providing ample opportunity for quality family time spent together (and, yes, I acknowledge that this may not always feel like a blessing).  

We have the privilege of knowing and walking with many leaders in churches, non-profits, and businesses. Regardless of where we lead, the pressure rises in times of great uncertainty for everyone. Considering the recent pandemic, we asked a seasoned women’s pastor and leadership coach, Rhonda Began, to share her process of leaning in and navigating these uncharted waters. We think there is something here for any leader. – Jeff & Terra

It is common to give a full day's effort at work, come home, and feel like there are only fumes left to give to the important people in our lives. We feel badly and wish we had more, but someone has to make sure food is on the table, lights stay on, and the kids...

When you think about the holidays, what is your first reaction? Take a second and take notice. Where do your thoughts go? What happens to your body? Do you feel excited? Happy? Overwhelmed? Sad? Anxious? Perhaps you feel all of these emotions? If so, you are normal! 

You may have heard us say that if you have a following, you are a leader. That means whether you are a mom, a pastor, or the CEO of a Fortune 500 company, you are a leader, and how you lead matters. Listening is one key strategy that helps leaders live with integrity. Many people assume they are great listeners. It’s a skill set we know is important, yet fail to practice. Despite optimistic beliefs about our own listening skills, it’s true that we often find ourselves lacking in the practical application of it during times we need it most: comforting a hurting child, addressing conflict in marriage, working out a misunderstanding with a friend, or navigating personality differences at work.

What is Betrayal Trauma? (Betrayal trauma is a reality for both genders; however for the sake of clarity, female pronouns will be used.)

In her book Intimate Deception, Sheri Keffer defines betrayal trauma as, “the act of being unfaithful to a spouse or significant other when there has been a commitment to exclusive fidelity. A violation of trust occurs when your spouse or significant other uses deception and manipulation to put more time, emotional and sexual energy or resources into another entity. This includes pornography, emotional and physical affairs, cybersex, hookups, flirting, sexting, massage parlors, prostitution, strip clubs, child pornography, sexual fetishes, cross-dressing, or undisclosed relationships with the same sex (2018).“ Regardless the type of betrayal, this kind of relational trauma undermines the committed relationship and can profoundly impact the well-being of the betrayed.

So many men I meet in my practice struggle to communicate their true feelings, and therefore, often fail to connect to their children. They often believe (mistakenly) that conforming to expectations — of stoicism, respect, relevance, being a provider, or a ‘man’s man’ — is somehow devoid of vulnerability. Because of this belief system, men find that their relationships with their children and loved ones are often defined and confined by unmet expectations and disappointment. This is not how it was intended, nor how how it needs to be.